Picking up the Pieces

How do you pick up the pieces? How do you move on? I’m 22 and just having to do this for the first time. from a relationship that was a lie. I stayed out of the fray for a long time because I wasn’t ready, I didn’t want to have something that was fleeting. I wanted something that mattered with someone that mattered.

So I waited until something came along that was easy. And I found that, at first. And I let my guard down. Of course there were great times; of course I was happy at first. But the memories are completely negated by the fact that he was making the same memories with someone else. Probably even on the same day.

What does this leave me? Does this even count as a relationship? I don’t know that I can emotionally count something where I was the ‘other woman’ for the entire time. It makes me sick that someone is so capable of hurting people like this. And the only answers given were “I didn’t have a reason to break up with you. I liked being with you.”

Those aren’t answers. They are copouts. They are way to justify actions are completely unjustifiable.  An attempt to manipulate a way out of a situation, which is a trait of a sociopath. Which is what you probably are. And you probably know it.

I don’t know how I cannot, NOT let this experience affect me in future. I was so guarded before, I can only imagine in a few months when I do get over this situation (I am over you) I will have trouble letting people in again, because look what happened on my first try.

But you will never win. This battle may be yours, but the war is mine.