Monday, March 11, 2013

Full Circle


“I think we might have someone in mutual in our lives, M****** ******t. I’m his girlfriend. We’ve been dating since Nov. 2011”

And with that. Everything changed.

A sucker punch straight to the stomach. Tears immediately welling up in my eyes. Everything was a lie.

I’m wide awake. –Katy Perry

Why did I not choose to see what was so clearly in front of me? It’s a simple answer. I loved him.
I’m the ‘caregiver’ archetype. You can see that in my career choice, the friendships that I have maintained, the life that I have lived. He was a challenge, and I saw him as someone who needed my ‘help.’ And he accepted it, taking the good energy I put out, and not returning any.

I knew you were trouble when you walked in. –Taylor Swift

I wish I could take back that night. The night when you said ‘hello.’ I wish I would have turned around and walked away. You were not worth it. The crazy that has enveloped my life over the past four months has been due entirely to one person. And even though I have had two months of distance from you, the crazy is still here, still finding me. Knocking me down again when I had moved on.

I don’t want it. I don’t want you. I don't want to be called a homewrecker, especially when it is clear you are the one that is doing the wrecking.

You are too proud to say that you made a mistake; you’re a coward to the end.-Marina and the Diamonds

There are two ‘worst parts’ to this. The first is that your girlfriend goes from informing me about your two timing ways to telling me she will file harassment charges if I ever contact you again within a six hour time span.

So much for ‘girl code.’

The second is that I know you will never feel guilty in the way that I want you to. I want you to hurt every day for the rest of your life. I want the ghost of me to haunt you. I want everyone to know what kind of person you really are. Because you are not a good person. 

But you can't hurt me anymore. You've already accomplished everything you can do.

Protect yourself cuz you'll wreck yourself. In this cold hard world, so check yourself –Robyn.

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